Samples from this site:

"We have a professional team of writers who undertake you [sic] order as a challenge and come up with a unique piece of material with the assurance of high grades.

Before hading [sic] over your order, our team of editors proofread [sic] your essay, dissertation, course work or assignment and also check [sic] it through plagiarized software ["plagiarized software -- that's a good one!], hence our customer satisfaction is our foremost priority.

We have earned our customer`s [sic] trust with our unique and high quality essays and dissertations."

Good grief.

*effect

I've read about three-dimensional holographic displays that detect human hand and finger positions* so that users can "type" on projected QWERTY keyboards or use speech-recognition software that will do away with hardware once and for all. I hope I live to see it, but even if I do, after 40 years, I'll probably still have to sit at my desk to use it. I've tried using a laptop in front of the TV and working during commercials, but it just takes too much time to get back up to speed so I gave this up. The egg timer is a good idea.

*You might want to turn this feature off when not in use. No one wants to start their day by having their computer say, "Bill, about last night..."

Exactly right. You're an excellent writer, by the way.

As Dave Barry puts it, "2012: Looking back in horror."

A war between just these three states would be interesting today. Texas would quickly make Alabama its b[itch], but New York might use its tactical nukes and blow Texas off the map (together with parts of Mexico) and "liberate" Alabama, giving us 49 states again. Just think of all of the flags that would have to be changed.

I keep a heating pad rubber-banded to the back of my desk chair.

I've always felt that if you can read about it, you can write about it.

I have mixed feelings about ambivalence.

This is the result of Google translate from English to Spanish and back to English:

"Please do not turn your articles. English is a funny language. Spinning that will make it even more fun! Plz never turn the work. English Forgets Copying edit em. Usually people use it for SEO research purposes. They are black hat techniques. All That goal is set to change as well since google seo ICT is updating algorithms (ie, pandas and penguins) :)"

Not great...

1. If you don't have access to EBSCO, subscribe to Questia. This service pays for itself every time I use it.

2. Try to write at least 360 days a year.

3. Find a steady source of clientele.

4. Take the high road but be practical. In dealings with clients, chose your battles -- try to accommodate minor changes for free but charge for major additions or changes that are not your fault.

5. If you retain the copyright to your work product, you can sell these on services such as AcaDemon (I don't know if I can say that or not so we'll see).

6. Be dependable (this is probably the most important thing).

Those are just off the top of my head, but it's like anything else -- you gotta work at it.

The closest I've come is $80,000 and that's with three writers working for me part-time. Too much work for the bucks, but that was 10 years ago. Today, the sky is the limit -- no project is too large -- no fee is too large.

I'll let you know this time next year :)

I remember watching Howdy Doody when I was about 5 or 6 (God I'm old) and the Peanut Gallery:



Thanks for the trip-down-memory-lane reference.

Deny everything and demand proof.

Forum rules prohibit recommendations of this sort in here, but try essaychat.com. You'll probably get the response, if not the help, you need in there.

Just "Google" some random sentences. Quick, easy and free.

I was j/k - that's a common error. You meant "advise." Hang in there and good luck.

Alas, therein lies the rub. In too many cases, we receive limited instructions and we do our best to interpret them since clients rely on our expertise. After they receive a finely crafted piece of work, though, everyone turns into an expert and tells us what is wrong and what we missed and how could we be so stupid to ignore this or that. Jeez. If we let them, they will abuse us unto severity. Stand your ground and demand more money before you sneeze on it again.

heh

Unfortunately, this seems to be the harsh reality right now and it looks like it's getting worse every day. At least I'm a real Oklahoma corporation and have been for a long time (since 2006), but it's still a crap shoot even with my papers (some are better than others). Some of my clients tell me they've been scammed two or three times, though -- unbelievable.


Wait until you practice law.

I was a paralegal for too many years (this profession is/was underpaid) and I've studied U.S. business and constitutional law so I'm not scared to tackle some of these assignments when the price is right. You're right that no one is sitting around waiting for these assignments, though, because they're tough. Give me an "our friend the beaver" paper anytime.

For that kind of money, there should be a happy ending.

If you provide them with all of that personal information, please contact me about some Nigerian oil stock I just heard about.

You paid $1250 for a six-page paper? That's $208 per page. Good grief!

Where do I sign up?

I agree. Consistency in this biz is tough. Sure, some papers will be better than others, but I figure as long as people are actually paying me for my critical analysis skills, I should tell them what I think. That's worked out okay so far, but some teachers (and clients) are just nuts and cannot be satisfied. Day-in-and-day out is also hard to do but it's way better than cubicleville.

By the way, my photo album at student.com ("Professor Verb's Compendium of Zany Pictures") has gone viral with more than 95,000 views. If you need copyright-free graphics for school-related topics, you can find them here. These are free pictures organized into categories ("professions," "arts and crafts," "computers," etc. and some "zany" ones).

Roughly: "How's it going, Russian buddies?"

Exactly right. I don't know what other companies' terms of service contract and disclaimer look like, but this issue is specifically set out in the ones I use.

All of the above.

Actually, I've made a study of class II gaming and their random number generators -- I don't think it's random at all. It's completely different from class III (Las Vegas type) but in the final analysis, it's still all blind-damn-luck.

I was exaggerating, of course, but Indian casinos are the only kind around here. I wrote a book on how to beat 'em, but I haven't sold any yet ;)

Thank you all for your spirited responses, viewpoints and arguments -- and you didn't even get too personal! Given that we learn a little (or a lot) from each of the papers we write, we must be the smartest people in the world. Where's that Jeopardy application...

p.s. Johnsmom: Did Paul write those thirteen letters? What do you think? (I'm writing a paper).

My wife says I'm a hermit. The library and Indian casino are the only places I ever get to go.

This can be a valuable addition to the 21st century skill set. In addition, I say we do away with teachers and public schools and just give all students their own laptops and put everything on the cloud (think of the money we'd save!). Legalize (and tax) marijuana! Ban handguns and tax the churches!

I agree, but we have to draw the line somewhere. All writing and no recreation can make anyone crazy...

You are absolutely right. This could be a (better) community.

I scanned their Web site and did not find any of the giveaway errors that ELS writers tend to make. They appear to be U.S. based and their TOS are straightforward ("what you do with the paper after you receive it is beyond our control"). As always, though, caveat discipulus!

*ESL (just woke up)

One of the founders of this business, Mike Von Plato, once told me, "If you have too much business, you aren't charging enough." He was a great guy.

What a string of horror stories. I'm just thankful I work with a reputable company that bends over backwards to accommodate its writers. There are no fines (good grief!) and the company generally supports its writers in controversies with clients.

You said it WAY better than me.